Stylish Spy tries a Wonders of Mycelium Ritual

TAKE ME WITH YOU…

The Langham has all the trimmings you would expect from a five-star, Mayfair-based luxury hotel, including smart doormen, huge chandeliers, crackling fires and no-expense-spared features and décor entirely in keeping with the property’s long history (and sterling reputation).

You can reach Chuan – the hotel’s spa - directly through a doorway at the back of the hotel, or (for a peak at how the other half live) head through the main reception and follow the corridors around, pushing H on the lift to whiz down to the basement.

SHALL WE SPA?

The spa’s reception area has muted green walls, cream marble floors and Art Deco touches, as well as a glass case showcasing products to tempt.

A charming man on reception greeted us and showed us around the spa, leaving us in the changing rooms. These are spacious with tall wooden lockers operated by a wrist band; inside you’ll find branded white robes, plain grey flip-flops and hangers for your clothes. We loved the pull-out tray in the middle containing little white boxes of amenities: dental kit, shaving kit, shower cap.

Marble sinks and vanity units, large oval mirrors and Art Deco lights add a touch of chic, while hairdryers, straighteners, cleanser, deodorant and cottonwool pads ensure you have everything you need.

Three showers behind glass doors have huge rain heads, retro tiles and French-branded shampoo, conditioner and wash. Help yourself to a rolled-up fluffy towel as you step out.

Within the changing rooms is a small but oh-so-hot sauna that could seat three or four, and an aroma steam room which was sadly out of operation on our visit.

The stylish Contemplation Lounge has green sofas and glass tables heaving with coffee table books. Help yourself to tea, citrus-infused water, dried fruit and nuts; fancy a vitamin shot or a smoothie? Ask a member of staff to unlock the fridge for you.

People traipsing through this room in fitness gear are using the spacious gym behind the glass wall, which is open 24/7 to hotel guests.

The highlight of the spa is the 16-metre swimming pool which you first glimpse from a curved steel staircase jutting over the blue water below (there’s a lift down too). The mosaic tiled pool is rectangular (making it ideal for lengths) and almost entirely fills the floor area, save a ledge with three sets of wicker seats and tables in pairs.

Swim in the silky blue water to the bonsai tree mural at the far end. Once a bank, the granite walls on either side are part of the original building. Despite the presence of pink-and-white-striped rubber rings - suggesting that little ones are welcome - we had the space to ourselves for 15 leisurely lengths.

TREATMENT TALK

We tried the Wonders of Mycelium Ritual (90 mins, £250).

Having completed a consultation form on an iPad, and chose my lunch from the hotel’s In Room Dining menu, my therapist, Joanna, met me in Contemplation Lounge and led me down a candle-lit corridor to a double treatment room called Spirit.

Still in my wet swimsuit, Joanna left the room so that I could put on some disposable undies, re-robe and sit on a chair opposite a copper bowel filled with warm water. The treatment began with a foot ritual; Joanna placing hot stones in each hand and asking me to close my eyes. She then washed, scrubbed and moisturised each foot in turn, leaving me fully relaxed.

Invited to snuggle down on the bed, lying face up, Joanna pulled a white duvet across me (an upgrade from the usual thin towel) and began the treatment with some smudging – lighting a stick of sage and wafting it around the room. The heady, earthy scent was intoxicating.

The facial began with a double cleanse using organic products from Wild Beauty: a lemony deep cleansing balm for the first cleanse and a purifying cleanser for round two. Joanna then closed the pores using a balancing skin tonic.

Using an oil, Joanna performed some yogic stretches on my arms - pulling them satisfyingly behind my head - and my neck using a towel as a pulling mechanism (more please).

Poultices made at the spa itself, and filled with herbs from Wild Beauty’s own farm in Wales, were then placed on my decolletage, neck and face, allowing the warmth to relax the tension in my jaw.

The mask that followed allowed Joanna to show off her skills with an epic massage, beginning at my shoulders and working her way up from my neck to my face with plenty of lifting and smoothing, especially around the eyes where smile lines have begun to creep in. The scalp massage that followed (complete with nourishing hair oil) was noteworthy.

The multi-faceted treatment ended with some under eye cream, serum and moisturiser, as well as one final tug of my neck with a towel and more sage burning.

Joanna gently brought me to and allowed to me collect myself whilst she fetched a pot of tea, which I drank from a cup on the bed.

HOW DID IT MEASURE UP?

Despite the number of steps for this Spa Spy to remember throughout this 90-minute ritual, I managed to relax beyond the norm. My shoulders and neck felt much looser, and my skin glowed.

SPOT OF LUNCH?

Guests lunching in the spa itself can return to the Contemplation Lounge to dine en-robe - or clothed.
On the menu: salads, sandwiches, grills, pasta and pizzas, along with desserts and hot and cold drinks, including wines and spirits.

Our chicken Caesar salad washed down with a bottle of alcohol-free larger arrived on a tray akin to room service, with a white table-cloth, mini sauces in jars, a rose in a vase, a white napkin and polished silver cutlery.

Guests walking by to use the gym next door felt a little odd but didn’t detract from the attentive service – or delicious food.

GOT ALL DAY?

After the full spa experience (including a spin in the gym), take advantage of being a hop and a skip from Oxford Street and all the retail/food outlets you could wish for.

SHORT ON TIME?

You can’t go wrong with a swim, a treatment and lunch.